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I have just returned from Koknese, from the ruins of the old castle.
I am writing under the impression. Most likely, I will not go there
any more. No stops were made during my driving back (some hundred
kilometers). Till now my fingers are shivering a little. I did not
experience such fear for many years. I have already forgotten, what
is it to be so afraid. It has turned out strange and silly. I have
gone to photograph the castle, because many asked me what may be
seen in Latvia. I decided to visit and make a pair of pictures. I
was driving for a long time, photographed nature along the way. On
arrival I went to look the ruins. They are as though in the middle
of the river, on the peninsula, going as a gusset to Daugava. The
castle ruins are on the end of this gusset. The youngsters gamboled,
climbed on ruins, played hide-and-seek. All they were climbing on
the walls. There are no steps there, you are to climb as you like.
Well, I also have climbed. Quickly, somehow in a monkeyish way. On
the one side the wall ends vertically into the river, on another
side it ends on fragments, some stones. It is not high there, some
eight meters. It seemed to me not high from below. But when I have
climbed and looked downwards, I started to feel giddy. I seized by
stones, but they were hardly keeping, as the castle is ancient. Well,
if I has climbed, it is necessary to photograph. The camera has
given up for some reason. In a half-minute I understood, that I can
not go down. The wall is almost vertical. I do not remember how I
have got to the top. The fear has paralysed me, I was in a kind of
panic. I have never been in such situation, in fact I am not afraid
of  height,
in the childhood I had a good time, climbing up a tower crane.
There are people around and what to do, whether to shout with a pity
shivering voice: " Help! Take me off from here". I
understood, that I will not survive such a shame. Somehow, having
planned at first, for what stones I should hold with hands and on
what to go with feet, I started to go down,
simultaneously checking the strength of these stones which could
simply jump out from the wall. And so, back to front, very slowly,
step by step, appeared on the ground. When I went to the car, I felt
low in legs
It is enough, I will never go there. It is
something strange in this castle, something wrong. On the picture
above: I was sitting at the top of this wall and did not know how to
go down. The night was approaching. On the picture in the middle: It
is nice to play hide-and-seek. Here. On the bottom picture: The
church in two hundred meters from the castle preserved better,
however it did not become less gloomy.
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 Not
stopping on achieved, next week I have visited one more castle. The
Headquarters of the knights of the Livon Order in. Cesis. Frankly
speaking, this trip cost to me of extreme efforts. On the opposite
ways from Cesis I was so tired, that I missed a car inspection post.
I have exceeded the speed by 30 km per hour. Well, the car inspector
asked me friendly: “Should we go home by bus?” (The Penalty for
such violation is 50 dollars or deprivation of the driving licence
for a half-year.)
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 One
more photo, in 300 meters from the pioneer camp where I had a rest
in the childhood. Then it was simply an old wreck with a
half-decayed stairway inside, only most courageous people were
rising along it. Well, today it is simply a cheap popular print. All
operating mechanisms are recovered. The stairway is new, it will not
fail under you as it happened previously.
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 Well
and at the last, a beautiful Latvian farm. To tell the truth, I had
a temptation to photograph a typical Latvian farm. But nevertheless
I have overcome myself and decided: Let the page to be completely
devoted to perfect and beautiful. It is really beautiful, ancient
khutor not far from Cesis, with a crane birds nest on a chimney. By
the way, each khutor has an own name and all of them are put on a
map. At change of the owner the name of the khutor is not changed.
There are typical names - "Small Birches", "Big
stones", "Small Oaks", etc.
August 2002
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